This is why I have a hard time making new friends.

About 3 years ago I was with a girlfriend and her fiance (at the time).  She was about 6 years older than me and was only my friend because my dad was her boss.  I had just moved to Hilton Head and had no friends so she was nice enough to hang out with me for awhile.

She had some friends in town from St. Simon’s Island, GA and I definitely didn’t feel “Beach Cool” around them.  “Beach Cool” is the easy style that people in the south along the coast have.  Its the ability to go to the beach, not break a sweat, not get sand where the sun dont shine and tan evenly. I am none of those things.  I sweat like a hog, whine that the sand is too hot, i usually only tan half my body, get my books wet (even though i go nowhere near the water) and find sand places where it doesn’t belong for the next 24 hours.

I managed to get through the afternoon without having sweat marks under my boobs (deodorant FTW) on my tank top nor did my entire forehead turn bright red being exposed to direct sunlight so I looked like I just ran a marathon.

All was going really well while we walked back up to the house.  We all went inside and drank a beer.  The sun was starting to go down and I needed to get home.

I hugged my friend goodbye because she initiated it then i hugged her fiance because he too initiated it.

Then it came to her friends who I just met that day.  We all got along pretty well and I would, at that moment, hang out with them again. There was that awkward dance were to you do a half-hearted hug or shake hands. It is like a dance among friends just seeing which is the more dominant member of the pack. It is also the timeframe where you would exchange phone numbers.  You just pray that the other person initiates it so you can go along.  We were on the same wave-length because we extended our hands then opened our arms to hug at different times.  Then she made the decision and went in for the hug.

My hand was still extended to shake her hand and thats when it happened.

I cupped her boob so very gently. I didn’t just brush it or skim it.  I grabbed it. and my hand remained there for the duration of the hug.  There was no sense in retracting my hand because then it would be a big deal. So i left it there in hope that maybe she just thought her left boob was extra supported during the last 5 seconds.

I wasn’t the only one who noticed. There was a very long “i didn’t know you were a pervert” pause where we all looked at the ground and mumbled the word “so…”.  I took this as my queue to leave. I made up some excuse like “oh i forgot I had to go hide in the deep end of a pool” and made haste.

This was 3 years ago.  I will have you know that I have not spoken to any member of “the incident” since.

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